Self-Evaluation in Ramadan

Self-Evaluation in Ramadan

June 13, 2016, New York City

During this meeting, we discussed Self-Evaluation in Ramadan.  We were contemplating a hadith by Prophet Muhammad which states, “Anyone who fasts and engages in self-evaluation in Ramadan will find heaven.”

The practice of fasting is widely followed in the Muslim community, but the practice of self-evaluation has been forgotten.  Self-evaluation is the spiritual component of Ramadan and it is something in which the Prophet engaged on a daily basis.  Regular self-evaluation helps us realize at the intellectual level that God and everything He said to us are things that really touch our lives and aren’t ideas that stay outside of us because we are busy and need to go to work and this is not the same time as when Prophet Muhammad lived.  If we think about it, we will realize that we can live our lives without once contemplating why we are doing what we are doing and that we are doing it because our family has been doing it for decades.

Self-evaluation helps us identify aspects of our lives that we would like to make better and then ask God to help us make them better. There are four aspects of our lives that are important to most people:  Spiritual growth, personal relationships, health, financial freedom, and professional success.  We want to see ourselves change for the better every day and when we feel that we are stagnating, it causes frustration.  Making sure that our prayer (salat) is personally meaningful to us by first making sure we understand the words we are saying and then by contemplating ideas behind those words we are saying regularly in the prayer should help us make our prayer more meaningful and in time, we should see the change in ourselves.  We need to make sure that when we fast we attempt to realize that it is a method of self-discipline and among many of its facet, one important one includes proving to ourselves that we are not subject to our bodies cravings but that we can and will do what is required of us in order to help God guide us where we want to go.  Our satisfaction in life also depends on the health of our personal relationships. Criticizing or blaming the other person for an unhappy relationship will not make it better, but finding out positive ways by which important relationships will become better is what will, in time, make them better.  It goes without saying that we can’t do much of anything unless we are healthy.   A good number of us lives in the world today where we can find healthy food and facilities for exercising.  Deciding on a healthy habit and keeping it is the way to achieve our goal of remaining healthy and avoiding diseases of our ancestors.  Poor financial situation is one of the main reasons for unhappiness for a good number of people.  Making plans for saving a portion of our income and giving away a portion of our income to worthy causes are the ways of increasing our wealth.   Finally, many people are unhappy with their jobs so finding ways to change our profession or make certain adjustments if a total change is not needed, can only come through thinking about, that is, evaluating what we can do to make this change or adjustment take place.  Setting up a plan with a career counselor as to the steps to follow to change our profession or make whatever adjustments may be necessary is one concrete way to see a positive change in this respect.

Overall, none of the above is possible without our first taking the time to think through what is making us unhappy and then attempt to see what we can actually do about it.  This is one of the purposes of fasting:  Self-evaluation to understand where we have been and where we are going so that, in time, when we ask ourselves (before we are asked by God), we can say to ourselves that we didn’t waste a life given to us for a particular purpose.  That purpose is what we are getting at when we engage in the practice of self-evaluation. 

Some of the ideas that came to mind to those who were present during this class include a notion that with self-evaluation comes planning – what is it that we want to see happen?  The aspect of thanking God is extremely important.  All Prophet’s duas (supplications) start with giving thanks to God.  Prophet also said that saying thanks to God is the best prayer.  Person who lives in a state of gratitude is in a stream of benevolence.  God clearly said that if we are thankful, He will give us more. A person becomes what he or she thinks about most of the time.  If our thoughts constantly revolve around what is going on at present, we become trapped in it. The present is constantly becoming a thing of the past so we should focus on what we want to see a week from now.  Dua means that we are unhappy about certain aspect of our life and that we are thinking about our lives, so we formulate an idea in our minds about what we want.  What is very important is that we need to realize what we are thinking of.  If we think about what is bothering us all day long and spend 2 minutes on dua, that isn’t going to help us.  We may pray for certain things but it is good to think through what we are asking in order to try to understand why we feel certain way.  In thinking about future, it is much better to utilize writing because it forces our minds to concentrate and think with specificity.  Being healthy was a huge part of Prophet’s religious practice.  “Fast, so you shall be healthy,” is also what he said. 

Summary by Alma Subasic

Chapter 35, Make Yourself Strong and Resourceful

On May 16th, we discussed chapter 35, "Make Yourself Strong and Resourceful," which is based on the following Ayas:

 

Sura 16; Ayas 75-76:

 

God gives an example - someone enslaved, owned by another, has no power over anything, and someone else whom We have given good resources from ourselves and who spends from it at will, both privately and publicly. Are these two equal? Praise and thanks be to God:  but most of them do not understand it.

 

And God gives the example of two men - one of them dumb, powerless, and a burden on his master:  to whichever task is he directed he brings no good.

Can such a one be considered the equal of someone who commands justice and is on a firm path?

The ideas expressed in these ayas convey an important evolution in religious thought:  seclusion and constant praying without doing much else, thought of as a mark of true religiosity/piousness throughout history, isn’t what God meant.  Those who understand where their resourcefulness comes from, work to use it to improve the future of humanity, and command justice are the ones who are on the right path and are truly pious.  This is where it becomes very important how we understand and interpret religion or what God is looking to say to us.  If we interpret it in a way where we are bogged down by following others’ (“authoritative”) interpretations involving endless rules and regulations as to how we are to behave, that interpretation leads to constriction and lack of productivity.  If we focus on the spirit of what God is looking to explain to us and dig deep within ourselves, then we start to focus on our own resourcefulness and  to see how we can join the forces of our fellow human beings who have made and continue to make this world a better place for all.  There are, of course, plenty of negative examples stemming from narrow-minded interpretations, but that is precisely why we are asked to first work to understand what the ayas say, then be generous in all our dealings, professional or private, and command justice.  On the face of it, it seems that these ayas also suggest that God gives someone less than others, but if we focus on His repeatedly telling us that He does not deal unjustly with a single human being, then we must see that the majority of people in this world are given the resources and that the majority’s job is to improve the conditions of the minority.  The truly enlightened understand the spirit of His message and are constantly finding ways to use their resources, everyone according to his or her capacity. 

Some of the thoughts that came to mind to those present during this class include the notion that we can be enslaved by our own mind patterns.  A good number of people want to feel accepted by their society (through cultural conditioning) and therefore feel that permission has to be granted for them to do anything.  Respect and  love are important but value of our life is also important.  We need to do things to make life better for us and others and we must learn to strengthen ourselves so that we don’t run away from life’s challenges.  A successful person is one who demands justice and is on a firm path.  People are not using their tremendous potential to change things.  It is not enough to pray - we must pray and act. What is happening in our lives is the direct result of what we are thinking.  Everybody should spend at least a year trying and really looking to understand the words of prayer.  It seems as though Islamic societies tend to discuss social rules that restrict people.  There seems to be a general narrowness of focus among Islamic societies and a focus on the wrong things.  We rarely hear an imam say to a woman that learning is mandated to all  by Islam, but we hear them all too often say that a woman should cover herself.   An interpretation of Islam that doesn’t inspire us to uplift people in whatever capacity we can must be the wrong one because it contradicts pages and pages of Quran that focus on doing good.  

The exercise developed by Dr. Abdulhameed for this chapter states:

 

Look up the names of Prophet Muhammad.  These are the attributes of strength for which he was known.

 

a) Identify three of these attributes you already possess.  What can you do to manifest these traits consistently so that people will know you through them? Write down your answer to this question in your journal.  

b) Identify three other of these attributes that you would like to develop.  In what ways can you change your behavior to manifest these attributes?  Write down the answer to this question in your journal.  

 

Summary by Alma Subasic

Chapter 34 – Uplift Those Below You

Chapter 34, Part 1 – Uplift Those Below You

During this lesson we discussed what the following aya says to us:

Sura 16; Aya 71:

God has bestowed more resources on some of you than on others: yet they who are more abundantly favored are often unwilling to share their gifts with those who are under their authority so that they might be equal in this respect. What! Will they, then deny that these favors are from God?

While there are many opportunities in life, all of us cannot take advantage of them equally. That is because some people are born in better circumstances, some people are more intelligent than others, some people are more resilient than others and so on. What this aya tells us is that while this “unequal state of things” among us is and will continue to be a fact of our lives and that the world is that way for a particular reason, it means that it is expected of those who are better situated in life to share with others, that is, to teach those who need coaching so that they can be equipped with tools to succeed, to provide financial help to those who are in need, or both. Those who do this understand the purpose behind what God is continually saying to us in this and many other ayas where he exhorts us to help one another. By helping others in whatever capacity we can, we understand that we are interconnected and depend, first of all on God, and then on others whose help we used to get to where we are in life: in order to survive, we need millions of people who produce food to bring that food to us; to get a job we have, we depend on schools where we are given knowledge that’s been condensed in books we read and which books contain compilations of knowledge accumulated through centuries.

By thinking deeply about what God is saying in this aya, we should eventually come to the very logical conclusion that we must help because we wouldn’t be here unless we were helped every step of our way. Our faith deepens and we reach higher levels of understanding once we do this because by doing the act of helping, it means we understood the true meaning behind God’s words. He promises us that it will only bring us closer to attaining a happy state.

Some of the thoughts that came to mind to those present during this lesson include: We are freed from the ego and experience a great expansion when we realize who we are (i.e., that we have been greatly blessed by God in many areas of life and have His divine spirit within us).The principle underlying giving is a spiritual one that states that we will receive abundance the more we give. If we worry about whether the other person will reciprocate, we are trapped in a small experience, away from God's stream of abundance. In order for spiritual growth to happen, we must “uncondition” ourselves, unlearn what we have learned, what we believe from our previous lives. All limiting beliefs can be unlearned. Quran always says: Give out of what We have given you. Everything that happens is from God and everything that we have is from God. You become one with the spirit if you give, you become part of the stream. The basic premise of the Quran is that God is Most Compassionate and Merciful. We are born in this stream and can be uplifted by it. The stream/God uplifts those who uplift others. Then you become an agent of God, but if you withhold it, you are outside this stream. We will never feel isolated or alone if we think of being part of this stream. Everything is from the Mercy of God. It is part of this stream. For example, if we read a good book and learn something from it, it is from the Mercy of God. Spend time to think about specific ways in which you are blessed. Do it regularly, for a long time. You will internalize this idea and will always feel blessed. By doing this, we eliminate the rust in our hearts (there is no shine because there is rust in the hearts). Then, we will always be happy, no matter what is happening outside. A good teacher will want you to be as good as he is. You want to make others equal to you, give them what you have. There is no limit to how far to mentor or encourage someone. You are a leader only if you are a servant. We benefit if we implement what we know within our own circle of influence. Unless we make something a habit, we don't do it: Make gratitude a habit. Opposite of gratitude is complaining. If you learn to be grateful, you won't need to ask for something because you will get a flood of abundance.
Summary by Alma Subasic

Chapter 33; What Do You Believe?, Part 2

Chapter 33; What Do You Believe?, Part 2

On April 18th, we again discussed Chapter 33 from Dr. Abdulhameed's book, "The Quran and the Life of Excellence" and those present were reacting to the below quoted Surah that inspired Chapter 33 by Dr. Abdulhameed. The summary of that chapter was provided in Part 1 on April 11th.

Those who ascribe divinity to other than God say: “Had God so willed we would not have served anything other than Him – neither we nor our forefathers; nor would we have forbidden anything without His sanction.”
Thus also said those who went before them. Yet what is the mission of messengers except to communicate clearly.

During our second discourse on this Surah and the chapter, we said that if we wanted to grow spiritually, we had to think. The trouble is, as we all know, that if we repeat things over and over and never ask questions, there can be no change in our spiritual development. What we attract is what we receive. If we sit down and quiet ourselves and think deeply about ways in which we have been helped, we will keep finding how we have been helped. Over the years, that becomes a deeply held belief in us -- that we truly have been and by consequence, will continue to be helped. That will lead us to fully realize that God is truly compassionate and merciful.

This is a call to reform and improve one's view of God. The society influences our belief and it is extremely hard to break away from that environment but we are responsible for actions that we take and where we end up. Other people are not responsible for our lives. There is a strong social pressure on young Muslims to subscribe to what their ancestors did and said and no deviation is allowed. That promotes conformity and stifles creativity and individual progress. All spiritual and social progress that is taking place in Muslim countries now is actually a result of Western cultural influences which Muslims decry.

We are looking for conformity no matter where we are so that we feel that we fit in. Conformity happens because we want to avoid criticism. If we want to grow as a person, we need to do what is difficult. People here in the United States always tell us not to live in our comfort zone.

A very high priority in our lives is to be in a group of people who are helping us grow. We need to seek company of people who love us for who we are and who help us grow. One Islamic teaching not shared in Muslim countries very often is that Imam Ali said that when children are under the age of 7, parents should play with them. When children are under the age of 14, parents should teach them and when children are over the age of 14, parents should be friends to them. Another fact that is also not shared in Muslim countries very often is that Prophet Muhammad used to spend a portion of his day every day by himself in introspection and in self-evaluation. Islam of today, for the most part, as judged by the behavior of many Muslims, is reduced to mindless repetition. We cannot then expect much progress no matter how much we want it. Each of us will have to go through a considerable process of serious self-evaluation in order to change what is inside of ourselves before God changes our condition. We will all agree that this is exactly what God Himself told us.

The exercise for this chapter states:
1) Is there an experience or an aspect of your life that shows that God is helping you?
2) Consider a prohibition that your parents believed in but you have discarded it. What are the reasons for this change?

The benefit from doing these exercises increases greatly if you not only think about them but also write down your responses. It is very useful to keep a journal for this purpose. Reading what you wrote over a period of time will make you aware of the insights you have gained.

Summary by Alma Subasic

Chapter 33; What Do You Believe? (Part 1)

What Do You Believe? (Part 1)

On April 4th, during our regular meetings in New York City, we discussed Chapter 33 from Dr. Abdulhameed’s book entitled "The Quran and the Life of Excellence."

The chapter is based on the Sura 16 Aya 35:

Those who ascribe divinity to other than God say: “Had God so willed we would not have served anything other than Him – neither we nor our forefathers; nor would we have forbidden anything without His sanction.”

Thus also said those who went before them.  Yet what is the mission of messengers except to communicate clearly.

This chapter explains that the above quoted ayas address 4 questions that deeply impact everyone’s life:

1)            What do we think about God?

2)            How do we relate to what we have been taught by the previous generation?

3)            How do we decide what we can and can’t do; i.e. what prohibitions are important?

4)            What is the role of a teacher?

1)            It is important that each of us examine what we are thinking about when we think about God.  The reason for that is that depending upon what we think about, those thoughts shape our lives and our lives will develop according to the beliefs that result from our thoughts.  Many people have believed in God for thousands of years, but often in ways that have limited them.  The first aya cited above refers to the argument put forth by those who ascribe divinity to other than God and it states that if God is in charge of everything, why doesn’t He make everyone believe in Him?  This argument is based on the notion that God controls people.  If that is the case, then we don’t have the freedom to choose and we are told by God Himself that we are free to choose what we are going to believe in.

2)            It is of utmost importance to our lives to pay attention to what we are thinking about when we think of God in order to improve our notion of Him.  This needs to be an independent examination as we work through the process of clearing out our previous ingrained notions of God that we heard from others as we were growing up.  Each of us alone builds a relationship with God in an effort to raise his/her life above commonality and traditional views of what we should believe.  Our spiritual power begins to gather when we focus on improving our personal view of God.  We must recall Hadith Qudsi in which God says:  “Whatever My servant assumes of Me, that is how I am to him, and I am with him as he remembers Me.”

3)            The second part of the first aya cited above states: “...nor would we have prescribed prohibitions other than His.”  This is where the limiting aspect of an unexamined belief clearly comes to forefront.  Precisely because our families and people that make up the culture we grew up in believe that, for example, smiling is forbidden, or that music is forbidden, or that a man without a beard cannot lead prayer, or that we should never speak of a good thing that happens to us because it can bring bad luck, we now have a sense of God, and consequently of religion, that is contrary to everything that is natural which in turn causes strain in our minds.  It is clear that this aya is asking us to reflect and examine what it is that our forefathers believed in and question the taboos prevalent in our surroundings.

The next aya cited above states: “Thus also said those who went before them”.  If we allow superstitions and prejudices of those who lived before us dictate how we will live our lives, then we ascribe divinity to other than God.  It cannot be stressed enough that this aya, along with so many others, ask us to reflect on what we believe so that we may reflect on what we are doing.  Without examining and reevaluating ideas and notions that we have been told by previous generations, we are not really living, but stifling our own nature and our own individuality and by the same token, we are closing the door to one more expression of God’s wishes for the humanity that He expresses through the potential of human beings, His vicegerents, on Earth.

4)            The last aya refers to the role of the messengers.  The aya explains that the role of a teacher is to explain to the best of his/her ability and not to control or judge people who do not respond in the way a teacher thinks they should.  Each person understands in accordance with his/her own capacity and responsibility lies on each individual soul.

Some of the thoughts that were expressed during this meeting include the idea that we try our best to be the highest selves and that each day we need to understand that He helps us raise the standard.  One considerably damaging aspect of following practices we were taught by prior generations without our reexamining the same is the fact that it can be quite difficult to discard those ideas because they become ingrained within us.  We don’t realize to what extent we labored under a false notion that those ideas are what God means to us without us coming to any conclusion as to what God means for us.  Beliefs have great power even over thought. Faith is expressed by challenging our beliefs.  

    

The exercise for this chapter states:

1)            Is there an experience or an aspect of your life that shows that God is helping you? 

2)            Consider a prohibition that your parents believed in but you have discarded it.  What are the reasons for this change?

The benefit from doing these exercises increases greatly if you not only think about them but also write  down your responses.  It is very useful to keep a journal for this purpose.  Reading what you wrote over a period of time will make you aware of the insights you have gained.

We will be discussing the same chapter during our next meeting in NYC on April 18th. Stay tuned!

Summary by Alma Subasic 

Chapter 32; Those Who Do Good Find Good, Part 2

Those Who Do Good Find Good, Part 2

(Chapter 32 in “The Quran and the Life of Excellence” by Dr. Sultan Abdulhameed)

And when it is said to those who are conscious of God, “What is it that your Lord has revealed?” They say, “What is good.” For those who do good, there is good in this world, but the reward in the hereafter is better still; for how excellent is the abode of the God conscious!

During our regular bi-monthly Meetups in New York City which are based on the book by Dr. Sultan Abdulhameed, our practice is to discuss one chapter from Dr. Abdulhameed’s book two times in a row. On March 7th, we discussed Chapter 32 (summary of the chapter and some thoughts of those present were posted previously) and on March 21st, we discussed the same chapter again.

When we thought about this chapter again, we thought that a person of faith is always hopeful and always tries to help self and others. It seems that a majority of Muslims is stuck and so paying attention to what we think about when we think about God, if we at all think about Him - which in and of itself is a problem - and reevaluating our beliefs should be our priority. We must understand that by following rituals blindly, memorizing Quran without reflecting on it and doing what others tell us we should do because that means piety, we tend to not think about what we are doing nor do we think about God. It is possible to go through our lives without once reflecting on what it is that God wants to tell us. Consider an example of an engineer memorizing a book on building a bridge; who among us would say that that bridge would not collapse? Being passive and accepting misery are states that are opposite of what this aya teaches because in order to do good and receive good, one has to actually think about what one wants to achieve and then act, that is, do something.

Reflecting back on the part of the chapter where Dr. Abdulhameed stated that a lot of us feel that we need an expert to tell us what is the right way to think because we are not learned in religion, we feel that trying to live through someone else’s mindset makes our lives complicated and difficult because that other person, that is, an expert, did not have the experiences in life we had. If we try to live our lives through someone else’s eyes, then we tend to compare ourselves to others. What can comparing ourselves to others mean to us and for our own lives? We must lay ourselves bare before our own selves because we are bare before God no matter what. So, why not be honest and brave with ourselves and ask ourselves what is it that we believe and why do we believe that and what is it that we want to achieve in life? We must ask so that we may receive.

What complicates things in many Muslim communities is that when we were taught the basic tenets of our religion, we were not taught to quiet ourselves so that we can hear ourselves and think deeply about God and the things He said to us. Our Prophet used to spend a third of the day and a third of the night by himself. Why? So that he may quiet himself in order to think and reflect. Any deep insight is not gained by cursory reading. If we think about something deeply, then we become resourceful.

Dr. Abdulhameed has also developed an exercise for each chapter to help us internalize the ideas behind the chapter. The exercise for this chapter states:

1) Write a paragraph about an interpretation of religion which results in harm. Describe an alternate interpretation of the same teaching that can be beneficial.
2) Write a paragraph abut a belief you had in the past out of which you have evolved. Describe how this change occurred.
3) What part of your life can be described as doing good to others?

Summary posted by Alma Subasic

Chapter 32; Those Who Do Good Find Good, Part 1

Those Who Do Good Find Good, Part 1(Chapter 32 in “The Quran and the Life of Excellence” by Dr. Sultan Abdulhameed)

And when it is said to those who are conscious of God, “What is it that your Lord has revealed?” They say, “What is good.” For those who do good, there is good in this world, but the reward in the hereafter is better still; for how excellent is the abode of the God conscious!

During our regular bi-monthly meetings in New York City, we discuss one chapter from Dr. Abdulhameed’s book and the following is the summary from our meeting on March 7th, 2016:

The purpose behind the aya that says that those who do good will find good in this world is that it refers to a formula for success and what it takes is that we need to focus on continually doing good. The religion has been used as a source of good, wisdom, and morality and at the same time, it has been and continues to be, used as a way to justify many injustices in the world. In addition, it has been used as a source of authority for those that want to keep the authority and advantages they have over others.

The teaching of this chapter is very simple and it says that we need to train ourselves to overcome our negative tendencies in order to let the true light within us shine, so that we can show with our own lives what is truly meant by this aya: positive thoughts, speech and action, thinking well of ourselves and others, creating a positive intention within our minds when we do something, not looking down on what God gave us in our person or our experience, letting go of anger, jealousy, hopelessness and self-pity, and never wishing to harm anyone. These are not lofty ideals that are unattainable or attainable only by a select few. The idea is to work on internalizing, that is, seriously thinking about and looking to understand what it means to be God-conscious - something that the first part of the aya is asking us to do - by making a concerted effort and being honest with ourselves as to what we are trying to do. If we try to contemplate this idea of God-consciousness a couple of times, an encouragement is surely to follow. Once God consciousness has been achieved, it become easier and natural to want to do good.

We must remember that the Quran and consequently, the religion of Islam, is not what it has come to mean for many people, judging by their behavior – a set of complex rules and obligations that burden. Working on true understanding of ayas is like any other effort that we do because we think it will be worth our while in the long run: we get as much out of it as we put into it. We must remember that if we don’t try, it doesn’t make sense to expect God to try.

Therefore, we must try to work on achieving God-consciousness by interpreting God’s ayas by ourselves and for ourselves without asking anyone whom we consider to be an authority in these matters to do it for us. We, of course, can consult the writings of those who have thought about the subject for a long time, but we must remember that everything we read must make sense to us so that it takes root within us. As we work on achieving the state of God-consciousness, we will begin to see encouragement along our way. Then, it becomes natural to want to do good and with a heart that is in alignment with our wishes, our wishes that now begin to reflect His will.

Dr. Abdulhameed has also developed an exercise for each chapter to help us internalize the ideas behind the chapter. The exercise for this chapter states:

1) Write a paragraph about an interpretation of religion which results in harm. Describe an alternate interpretation of the same teaching that can be beneficial.
2) Write a paragraph abut a belief you had in the past out of which you have evolved. Describe how this change occurred.
3) What part of your life can be described as doing good to others?
  
Our practice is to discuss each chapter during two consecutive meetings so Part 2 will be discussed on March 21st. Stay tuned!